My fifth attempted day was the first one on which I succeeded in being totally complaint, gossip, and criticism free for a full 24 hours in a row. I was actually kind of happy about it, because apparently, it takes some people a full month to get there. Also, instead of the 20 to 30 failures most people have in a day, I was only catching myself in six or seven of them. Only six or seven, of course, because I really was making a very concerted effort to pay attention to the words that fell out of my mouth.

Again, a refresher on the instructions of the challenge as I understand them:
1. No complaining - For any reason whatsoever, no verbal or written expression of pain, grief, or discontent.

2. No gossiping - All words spoken about a person not present must be complimentary and must be able to be repeated, word-for-word, in front of that person.

3. No criticizing - No speaking badly about myself or anyone else, even if I don't know them.

So for at least one full day, I managed to get through this. It was challenging, but honestly, it wasn't as challenging as I expected it to be. Now I've relapsed, though, and I'm trying again. Here were some of the things that were challenging for me:

1. Last week's track club run. I didn't start the bitching, but I did participate in it.

2. I turned an ice cold glass of wine bottom-side-up in my lap. My initial default response was, go figure, a complaint.

3. I was at a concert last Friday night where it was really unbelievably hard to NOT talk shit about some of what we saw. Really. You'd have failed, too.

4. Work, and a short sales meeting. I need not say more, except that I swapped that band from one wrist to the other so many times that I'm literally surprised it's not broken.

Other than these, there have been some slip-ups here and there but for the most part I've done alright. I love this challenge. Even in trying for the few days I've been trying, I've noticed that it isn't about getting it done... it's about experiencing what it's like to live more positively. Days on which I slip once or twice are still better days than when I'm not paying attention at all. "What if something happens?!?" is a question that one of my friends asked about how a person could possibly go 21 days without complaining. Well, things are going to happen, like turning a glass of wine over in your lap, like a frustrating meeting at work, like challenging workouts. The whole point is to handle them with grace, equanimity, and positivity. The whole point is to be in control of your own experience.

As I briefly mentioned, I've noticed some ENORMOUS benefits from living in the way I've been living over the last nine days. Here they are:

1. My thoughts are much more positive and my mood has been dramatically increased. I haven't been at all cranky or impatient, even during what should have been my PMS week.

2. All of a sudden people seem to REALLY like hanging out with me. They're calling more often, coming by, joining me for nights out, inviting me to future things. I'm being randomly approached by men in a variety of likely and unlikely places (awesome flattery, I must admit). I've had more friends around me in the last week or so than I've had in a long time, and that feels really good.

3. This is the really big one - I have found that when I make myself be positive in this very moment no matter what is occurring outside of me, this very moment becomes an absolutely fantastic moment in which to live. I think that sometimes, I was previously focusing a lot on the past and the future because I was habitually irritated in the present (which therefore made it uncomfortable). When I stay positive, it's so easy to be here now. This is a much easier way of being. I love it.

So here I am again... less than 12 hours complaint free, but committed, nonetheless, to training myself for a more positive life. In some ways, I think it's almost better to take a long time to complete this challenge... the longer it takes to get through those 21 consecutive days, the more practice I have in paying attention to what I say and, further, what I think.

It is not an event. It is a process.

P.S. If you're wondering what the hell I'm talking about, here's the post that explains this in more detail.

These are decidedly skinny jeans, so I don't wear them all the time. After all this running, though, they're actually baggy on me, so I pulled them out to wear tonight to the perfect occasion - a Dave Matthews Band concert. They'll be comfortable and they'll look really cute with the t-shirt I'm going to buy tonight.

And then I remembered. Besides the above, the last time I wore them I tripped on something and fell, ripping the left knee WIDE OPEN. We're not just talking Lucky Brand fashion rips now... a good pull and the leg would come right off.

So, I just spent the better part of the last hour gently and lovingly hand-sewing them back to their original condition. They look great. I'm stoked. But just for kicks, ponder the irony of this with me:

I paid $150 for a pair of jeans that look like they're 25 years old. If my grandmother were still alive, this would be the thing that would kill her. I wore them for three years, spilled stuff on them, and ripped them into oblivion and now I'm mending the part of them that was supposed to be ripped in the first place?

They're cute. They're worth it. And they make my ass look really, really good.

THE ECC'S MISSION
"The Empty Cages Collective (ECC) is a New York-based animal and environmental advocacy organization. ECC aims to cultivate a culture where animals are recognized as fellow sentient beings worthy of respectful and compassionate treatment. Through advocacy, education, hands-on rescue and assistance, the ECC envisions a world free of animal exploitation, abuse, and ecologically destructive behavior."

Amongst other things, the ECC is trapping homeless animals, neutering or spaying them, and returning them into their natural habitats. Ideally, of course, they'll go to clean and safe homes instead of back out into the wild but at least for now, there are way to many of them and not enough of us.

There are two cats in my household. I would have 20 of them if I could. They are wonderful little beings, and it makes me feel glad to know that these folks are doing something to stop the population problem before it begins instead of, dreadfully, after.

For every female cat they take in and spay, twelve fewer kittens will be born next year. I think that's wonderful.

I don't think the ECC yet has their own website, but the Petfinder page is here. They accept donations via Paypal. You can also do what I did: donate a few items from their Amazon Wish List. There are items priced as low as $3.00. They'll be shipped directly to them and you know you're sending something they need.

Not long ago I decided to do one random act of kindness per day. Donating to this very worthy cause was today's. :-)

There apparently isn't any way to manufacture a milk that contains enough fat to sustain the poor little guy:

I won't say too much because I really hope you'll buy the book. I'll even go further to say that I promise you won't regret it - it's a fast and light page-turner, I think, full of great information.

In essence, the challenge is this: Refrain from complaining, gossiping, and criticizing for 21 days straight. "Complaining" is defined as any verbal expression of grief, pain, or discontent. The hypothesis is that complaining does absolutely nothing to improve upon a situation, that our thoughts attract our experiences and our words are an expression of our thoughts, that the two feed off of one another and, therefore, we're creating our own experiences with what we say and think. The challenge involves a purple wristband (although you can substitute anything... I chose a less-obvious hairtie that I may wear in place of the band they're sending me). When you find yourself complaining, you move the band from one wrist to the other, continuing to move it after each complaint. After a move of the band, the challenge starts all over again in that moment, and continues until you've managed to go 21 straight days without moving it. Will Bowen describes failing at one of his own attempts on the 20th day!

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude," is a quote from Maya Angelou that sums this up quite well. Bowen's point is that time is going to pass whether you enjoy it or not. So why not enjoy it?

On average, Bowen says, it takes anywhere from four to eight months to be able to complete the challenge. He's mailed more than 5.5 million bracelets out to people around the world, twelve of which went to - this one brings tears to my eyes - an office full of people at The Pentagon.

At least for now, the bracelets are free... you just pay 75 cents to have two of them shipped to you. More information about A Complaint Free World and to order bracelets, visit the website. For those of you who are like me and shy away from anything even slightly dogmatic or religious, don't worry... although Bowen is a minister at a non-denominational church, he describes this as an entirely "non-religious human transformation movement." You can be an agnostic or atheist and still participate in this movement. Belief or non-belief in God has absolutely nothing to do with it.

My biggest challenge, I know, is that it's hard to be a smart ass without complaining! Since I write, I also need to remember not to complain in writing. I'm committed, though. In fact, I got through most of yesterday without complaining and through one of my least favorite chores... grocery shopping... with only having to switch my band one time. My good friend and roommate, Laura, has agreed to take on the challenge with me. After only one day, we both already feel more positive.

I'm planning to journal this experience here, since I imagine that I'll be presented with a few obstacles in my attempt to go 21 full days focusing on nothing but the positive. I also imagine, more importantly, that I'll have some incredible insights. I'm so looking forward to it. The banner will be up until I finish the challenge. I'll update it each time a full 24 hours goes by without a complaint. It apparently takes most people a good while before they can go a full day without complaining, gossiping, or criticizing even one time. That zero may be there for a while, and it may pop back up a few more times down the line.

Right this minute, I am complaint free for almost eleven hours. :-)

Running isn't a totally new thing to me... I've done it every now and then over the years for the cardio portions of my workouts, but this is the first time I've really applied myself to it. After only a few months I am seeing awesome results - improved endurance and recovery times, better breathing, increased distances. So far, my longest straight run with no walking is just over seven miles. I love it for other reasons, too... it regulates anxiety, gets the endorphins flowing, helps me to sleep better, gives me much-needed opportunities to zone-out, and has sculpted muscles I didn't even know I had.

This morning I ran my first race. I chose a 5K, even though I've been running much longer distances, if for nothing more than to set myself up for total ease and success. My finish time was 33:56, which equates to just under an 11-minute mile - not fantastic, but also not bad at all for my first race. One of my girlfriends ran it with me and the best part is that the time flew by in no time, I could have kept going for a whole lot longer, and I had a ton of fun. I absolutely loved it, so much so that I'm seriously thinking about running This 10K in two weeks. There's a half-marathon coming up in January 2009, as well as San Diego's Rock 'n' Roll Marathon. I'm just about ready to commit myself to that one so that there's no turning back. I have just over nine months to train for it - more than enough.

Addicted? Maybe so. It's one of those addictions I think I might just be okay with having.

It's true. So true.

For the last week and a half I've been doing everything I can to help a friend recover from very recent heartbreak. In doing so, in having done so with a whole bunch of friends, actually, and in having been there twice myself, I'm finally realizing that there can be positive things that come out of pain. Since I know it's a subject that affects just about everyone at some point or another, I thought I'd share a few things that I think make it easier to get on one's feet after a split.

People handle things differently, I know, so I don't mean the following in any sort of always or never sort of context. I would just love to know that someone I care about has benefited from the lessons I've learned. I see these as cardinal guidelines that are quite helpful when they're followed. So if you're out there in pain, dear reader, I sincerely hope that this helps:

1. When it's time to get over someone, get away from them and let yourself get over them. It's one thing if you just dated the person for a month or so and there isn't any residual pain around the split... fine, then, be friends. I got most of my guy friends this way. But if you're in love with the person, don't try to be friends with them. "But our friendship was the best thing we had!" Yes, I know. That's the hardest part. Maybe there will come some later time that the two of you can be friends, perhaps after you're in love with someone else or have otherwise moved on with your life. Someday when you no longer feel in love with the person, when you have absolutely no desire to be with them, and you couldn't care less whether they're with someone else, meet them for coffee or a drink. Unfortunately, foresight is almost totally blind. It might take years for that to happen. The day might never come at all. If you feel like you've lost someone particularly special, I think it's fine to keep in touch here and there with quick phone calls or emails, but keep them brief and superficial.

2. One point in Eat, Pray, Love, "don't make your life a monument to your ex." In fact, go out of your way to banish thoughts of the other person. Take down the pictures and put them away where you won't accidentally run across them. At the same time, though, don't bash. Have compassion. Be understanding. I really believe that the simple psychological truth is that the most important thing our significant others do is to force us to look in the mirror. Start looking inside of yourself. Work there. You have no control over anything else, anyway.

If you really love another person, then you love them unconditionally. Love them regardless of what they're doing or whether or not they're meeting your needs. Give them space and love them no matter what. Love them even if you're never going to see them again.

3. When something significant ends, spend plenty of time alone, getting over it. Don't be a serial relationship partner... don't rush right into something new. Yeah, yeah, yeah. "The fastest way to get over someone is to get under someone else" is another great quote from Eat, Pray, Love - you'll probably see me quoting it a lot from now on. It's true. So go ahead. Get under someone. Just don't make more of it than you're capable of making or of really showing up for.

There are differing opinions on how long people need to take between relationships. In numerous places, I've read that it's wise to plan for half as much time as you spent in the relationship, and that seems to me like a good place to start. I've talked to a psychologist whose opinion I trust more than almost anyone's, and she sees that as a bare minimum. In fact, she's ventured to tell me that in terms of long-term fulfillment, the mean time what you do with it is more important than the time spent in the actual relationship itself... that it might be some of the loneliest, most depressed times of your life, but the truth is, it's also a time that can be rich with irreplaceable self discovery that could never take place when you're deeply involved with another person. It is vital. Without it you're dooming any potential new relationship from the very start. You're clouded by your past and you're not able or available to love someone else. The truth is, you are burying your pain deeper, where it'll later crop up as, ironically, both difficult to address and impossible to ignore. You're wasting your own valuable recovery time. Don't move backwards. Don't be afraid to be alone with yourself. If you can't be alone with you, how can you expect someone else to be alone with you?

4. When you are ready to choose again, be choosy! From what I can tell, people choose partners for different reasons. I think it's wise to use past experiences as refinement to help you choose more wisely next time. For example, if you're a person who wants intimacy and commitment, start learning how to choose people who want, and are ready for, intimacy and commitment. If you're a man who needs a break from commitment and you just want to have some fun and take some mellow time before settling down, be careful about involving yourself with a woman who is upon the second snooze slam of her biological clock.

Simply put, to make things easier on yourself the next time around, learn the red flags that tell you that prospective partners aren't ready or are, simply put, just looking for something different than you're looking for.

5. Don't allow yourself to become accustomed to falling apart. I see emotions as very separate from thought and, therefore, I'm pretty sure they can't be controlled by thought. So especially in the beginning, I think it's indispensably important to feel the pain that exists around the reality of losing that other person. It's sad. Sometimes it's tortuous. So feel it. Every now and then, go ahead and cry. But then start being careful about it. Chin up and smile even if you feel like hell. You know what? Just the smile, alone will start to change your mood. I promise. Try it.

I once heard it described in this way: When you crumple up a piece of paper, it creates creases in the paper. If you flatten the sheet out completely and crumple it up again, it'll fold on the same lines as the first time. Continually flattening and crumpling the paper will only reinforce those lines. "What's your fold?" is a question I've asked a handful of people not long after meeting them. Mine has been sadness. Depending on the circumstances, I can go there pretty quickly. I can also decide not to go there, and I think that's healthier.

I want my new fold to be happiness. Joy. Giddy laughter.

6. Decide to be happy, no matter what. Forget external circumstances. They don't really matter. Fake it 'til you make it. Throw yourself into activities that make you happy. My picks have been spending time with as many old and new friends as I can think of, writing, reading a bunch of books, traveling (I've taken one trip and I'm planning three others for the very near future), and the really big one, exercise... running and Yoga, mainly. I've been doing a whole bunch of both for months now and as a result I'm eating more healthily, drinking less, I feel awesome, and I'm in better shape than I've ever been in my life. I also feel really sexy. All things I'll be glad about the next time I find myself excited about someone new!

7. Remember that you will get over this. You will love someone again. Your capacity for love has been increased by loving this person who you've lost. Five minutes before you met, you didn't know that the two of you were going to meet, and maybe this very moment is five minutes before you'll meet someone ten times more appropriate for you. You're young. You're beautiful. You have so much to offer. You will have this chance again, and it might be more wonderful than you could ever have possibly imagined.

Chin up. Let a little sunshine in. This will all be a distant memory in no time, and all will be well again in your world.

Oddly, the colors of the lasagna correspond well with the new look of this website.

Here's a recipe that combines how I did it with how I'll do it next time:

1 package whole wheat lasagna noodles
1 large can tomato sauce
3 large or 5 small zucchini, sliced thin
1 lb. of fresh spinach
2 lbs. of mushrooms, sliced thin
4-5 cloved fresh garlic, minced
1 medium red onion, minced
1/2 lb. mozzarella cheese
1/2 lb. ricotta cheese
2 Tbsp. oregano
2 Tbsp. basil
4 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Cook the lasagna noodles and lay aside on wax paper. In a large pan, heat olive oil and saute onions, garlic, zucchini, spinach and mushrooms until thoroughly cooked. Add oregano, basil, salt, and pepper.

Heat tomato sauce in a separate pan. Once hot, spoon a small amount into the bottom of a large baking dish. Lay one layer of noodles on top.

Spoon veggie mixture thinly over lasagna noodles. Add a layer of ricotta and mozzarella cheese, then sauce. Next add another row of noodles, weaved in the opposite direction. Continue layering veggies, cheese, sauce, and noodles until all ingredients are used or pan is full. Spoon tomato sauce on top and layer mozzarella cheese to finish.

Cover baking dish with aluminum foil (dull side facing up). Bake in a preheated 350-degree oven for 45 minutes. Let cool for about 15 minutes before serving.

Voila! Delicious.

They had one... a boy. It went well. Two years later, they decided they'd have a second. Nine months later they had twin girls. I will just go on and admit it now - this is one of my worst nightmares, and one that the universe will likely bestow upon me because I truly am terrified of it happening, kind of like bees stinging you because you're afraid of them. I've long thought I'm only good for one child, maybe two, but three? No. As good as she is with them now, my client felt the same way.

Anyway, her kids are actually pretty good, and believe me, I'd tell you if they weren't. I see more than my fair share of bad ones when I'm visiting people's houses. The girls, now five, look, act, and talk almost exactly like Drew Barrymore in E.T., which makes them adorable even when they're screaming and arguing. Today's fight was about sharing toys:

Girl 1: Give me that Tinker Toy. I need it for this.
Girl 2: I had it first.
Girl 1: You ALWAYS get it first.
Girl 2: Zachary broke them all anyways. This one is broken, and so is this one.
Girl 1: Mom, you know what I'm gonna ask Santa for this year?
Mom: What?
Girl 1: My OWN set of Tinker Toys. Zachary always breaks the ones we're a'sposta be sharing.
Zachary: If you don't stop talking about it, I'm going to break a lot more than the Tinker Toys.

I started laughing out loud right there. And you know what? Their mom did, too.

Five years may be long enough for me in this same job, particularly when it's a job that is wholly reliant on our currently plummeting economy. Business has been slowing for several months now, in addition to the fact that it just doesn't offer me the same satisfaction that it once did. It's time to move on, or at least it's time to look in that direction. Goodness knows I'm not going to rush into the wrong thing so I'm taking my time with it.

Since I don't like changing jobs, locale is weighing very heavily in my job search and is determining the companies I'll consider. I have a very strong background... both educationally and experientially, and I consider myself to be extremely marketable. My plan is to stay in sales, but to make the leap from home improvement to pharmaceuticals... a much more economically-sound industry than the one I'm currently in. I'm only considering jobs that will afford me the opportunity to transfer to the Bay Area. It's a place I absolutely adore, in which I've wanted to try living for a good while now. After all... I can always just come back if I'm not happy there.

The soonest I can move is early May 2009, since I'm locked into a lease here until then. I'm a creature of habit, and definitely not positive I want to go. I suppose my final choice will depend on how my life pans out here over the next nine months, but I will say that I'm very seriously considering it. If I move, it will be for an incredible opportunity (there are a few of them out there!), which means I'll be in a good position to start myself off on a nice footing.

All of that said, I know there are a few of you reading up there and I'd love your input on this: My desire is to live either in Berkeley or, much more preferably, actually in San Francisco. I haven't fully explored the whole territory with this move so seriously in mind (give me a month or so and I will have), but in-reach neighborhoods I know that I love are near Union Street, Noe Valley, and the cleaner parts of the Haight. I would want to live alone... a large one-bedroom will do just fine. It must be in a SAFE part of town (I'm done with the ghetto), close walking distance from at least one BART stop, and it must be cute. I'm down with putting some money and my own touches into a new place, but the bones need to be nice.

If you live in San Francisco and have any input to offer, large or small, I would greatly appreciate it... please drop me a line at julie at this domain. And of course, I'd love to know any suggestions you might have for great ways for a newbie in town to meet like-minded folks.

I will just go on and admit it now: I am one of those annoyingly fatalistic people who believes that everything happens for a reason. I'll write more about that later as it relates to one of the most profound books I've ever read... I already have notes compiled. It's a huge post in its own for a different day.

I have close friends who would love to argue with me about this, who just know we live lives of coincidence, that there's no plan, that life is nonsensical, and for absolutely no purpose. They might be right. I'm in no place to say that they're wrong. But I've had far too many personal experiences of total, barely-possible serendipity to believe that this is the case in my own life. My friend's current situation, for example, has provided me with a remarkable opportunity to experience empathy (which I really see as the greatest act of self-love), to perform random acts of kindness (which have become necessary for my happiness), and to take a closer look in the mirror at how I've behaved in my own similar situation, how I can make better choices for myself now, and how I can improve my future experiences.

That look in the mirror doesn't just take place when I'm awake. It also happens when I'm sleeping. I've been tracking my dreams for a while now, from the Jungian perspective I learned in graduate school, in which I believe so wholeheartedly. There's no way I can summarize it without butchering the hell out of it, but I will say that it honors the self as all-knowing, dream characters as parts of that self, items and experiences as symbols, and hypothesizes that when properly deciphered our dreams will point, like arrows along a roadway, to our next best steps toward growth and evolution. The funny thing about dreams is that once you start to track them, they become endlessly abundant. My dreams often occur in the early morning hours after I wake up to go to the bathroom and drift back off into my last three hours of sleep. Anymore, there is never a night on which at least one does not occur, so much so that I'll often lie down thinking to myself alright, what's it going to be like tonight? Going to sleep has become exciting.

On mornings like today, I need and allow myself an hour to record them before I do anything else at all other than pour myself a huge cup of strong coffee. They go on and on, into complexities that I sometimes can't even find words to describe (though it's never, ever for lack of trying). I dream in color... vivid color. Some dreams are good, and others are terrible, although those are just labels that I'm putting on them. Sometimes, I dream profoundly. Other times, my dreams are so ironic and appropriate to the current circumstances of my life that I actually laugh out loud when I'm writing them down.

I would never share the specifics of my dreams here and I have, in fact, moved much more towards being less and less self-revealing in my public writing. Besides, the content isn't important. What is important is what I make of it: that my dreams over the last few nights have pointed to a transformation from the old to the new, a shedding of old belief systems, a recognition of how vital it is for me to keep my mind clean, positive, and healthy, and a celebration for finally having had the courage to be honest about who I am, my capabilities (and incapabilities), and to speak immeasurable one hundred percent personal truth even when it might mean sacrificing something that is incredibly dear to me. Sometimes there's occasion to question whether or not you did the right thing. Other times, you just know that you did. With that knowing comes incredible joy and freedom.

For as long as I can remember I've had a shoebox in which I put things when it's time to retire them. Framed pictures, old birthday cards, notes, jewelry. It's a place where things go to be transformed from reminders into memories. Sometimes, symbolically and ritualistically, I put my thoughts there too when they've become habitual, and even feelings when they become to much to carry with me, when they've worn a groove that refuses to let them go. I opened the box early yesterday morning for the first time in several years and placed three small objects inside of it. This time, I was struck by the fact that I barely recognized most of what was already there from over the years. I have become a different person... a person I love and like more than I ever thought possible. I thought of one of Elizabeth Gilbert's many brilliant quotes from Eat, Pray, Love, a wonderful book that I'm about a third of the way through. She described catching an unexpected glimpse of herself in a public mirror near her home in New York City. Rather than seeing her own reflection, for a split second, her brain saw another person she thought she knew and wanted to rush to see again:

"Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend."

I chose a different place for the three new items I'd just put in and I dispersed the others... some to trash, others to appropriate other spots.

I threw the box away.

Anyway, all of a sudden, this season the two Botwin boys are growing up. In fact, Hunter Parrish in the role of Silas Botwin, the oldest of the two Botwin boys, is downright bloody freaking rip-the-clothes-off-the-dude-and-throw-him-down-on-the-bed hot. Seriously smokin' hot. Good Lord. I'm not kidding. I haven't seen a man this hot in a very, very long time, if ever.

I looked him up tonight. In reality, dude is twenty-one. Thank GOD!!! I think I literally breathed a sigh of relief, because until I read that, I was having unbelievably impure thoughts about a seventeen-year-old television show character.

Down, girl.

My dad bought me this ring several years ago as a birthday gift... one of my very favorite original Tiffany rings. I loved it dearly and cherished it until I took it off to wash my hands in a public restroom and never saw it again. Stupid, stupid. It has been nearly four years since it was on my finger. To this day my dad doesn't know I lost it. If he knew he would feel terrible, and would rush to replace it immediately.

I have been thinking about replacing it myself ever since then and today, I did. Actually, back up a step... I went to Tiffany on Saturday to look at the ring. I told my story to a sweet saleswoman who helped me find my size, and then left it there because of cost. Business has been very slow and this was a frivolous purchase that I couldn't really afford to make. Today, though, I found myself at an appointment right across the street from that same Tiffany... the only one in San Diego. Having lunch by myself, I silently talked myself into the ring, then back out of it, then back into it, then back out of it. And then I remembered something - my sweet dad has not been well. It doesn't look like it's anything terribly serious and he's getting better every day, but still... for a lot of personal reasons it has really hit home for me. Then I realized that this means so much more to me than just a flashy piece of jewelry. It's a symbol, and an important one. I took one last bite of my sandwich before heading over to buy it.

When I got to the store, the same woman who helped me Saturday looked up from the counter to lock eyes with me, and a smile crept lightly across her face. "You're back," she said. "Let me get your ring."

I will never lose it again.

The above is a picture that I took from a helicopter, of a small stretch of the Kalalau Trail, a treacherous 11-mile hike that leads to this secluded beach. Our friend Gabrielle did this hike... we picked her up at the end of it, exhausted and, quite honestly, somewhat glad to be alive. I would love to have the guts to hike this. Maybe someday I will.

This was my first trip to Hawaii, and there really are not words to describe how incredibly amazing it was. I imagine that there is a word to describe how beautiful it is there, and I'll bet it is a Hawaiian word.

While on this trip I had the amazing fortune of swimming with spinner dolphins, night snorkeling with manta rays, kayaking through pristine blue bays and up rivers to waterfalls, hiking through amazing green jungles, hanging out with a few mongoose, zip lining through the treetops of a Kauai forest, learning to paddle board, riding a helicopter, taking a day-long trip up the Napali Coast aboard a luxury 55-foot catamaran, dunking myself in a variety of fresh and salt water swimming holes, snorkeling through some wonderful reefs, enjoying cocktails and food at some of the loveliest of Hawaiian establishments (including, by the way, some of the very best fish - raw and cooked - that I've ever eaten in my life), spending down time in gorgeous oceanfront hotels and condos, driving around a good part of the island of Kauai, experiencing my first SCUBA dive, and participating in a million other wonderful activities too numerous to list here. I did it all. Literally... all.

I had the pleasure of seeing these wonderful islands in every possible way... via foot, car, sea, and air. I don't think I could possibly have had more fun than I did. It was the most active vacation of my life, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I hope to be able to get back there at least once every couple of years.

I can't imagine that any person could go to Hawaii without bringing home a newfound sense of appreciation for the enormous beauty that exists on this earth.

You can take your own personal online tour through the things we did by viewing my Yelp reviews in this list.

As for the photos, they're all here. Or if you'd rather not pore through all of them, my favorites are here.

And it's probably a good time to mention... unless you're a personal friend of mine you'll notice that the visible photos in these sets and throughout the rest of my flickr world (past, present, and future) are scenic only. I've privatized all pictures of people, including pictures of me. This is only one small part of my effort to tremendously scale back what I share in the online world. You may notice some big changes on this website, too.

If I know you personally and you're not already a contact on flickr, click here to learn how to identify yourself and make my Friends & Family photos viewable to you. Otherwise, just enjoy the scenery.

Here's one of my manta ray friends, who had a wingspan of about 14 feet. He looked right at me!

Yes, I was THAT close. :-)